Weekly Web Roundup (10/15/16)

Photo Credit: bjmccray

Due to Hurricane Matthew storming through Florida last weekend, I did not write a "Weekly Web Roundup" post last Saturday. So here are some interesting stories from around the web that I've seen during the past couple of weeks:

Seeking Clarity in This Confusing Election Season: Ten Thoughts by Kevin DeYoung (The Gospel Coalition)

Many evangelical Christians find ourselves in a quandary as to whom should receive our vote for president this election, or even if we should vote at all. Pastor Kevin DeYoung offers some helpful things to consider.

It's Never Too Soon to Talk about Race in Your Church by Jemar Tisby (Christianity Today)

"I desire for churches that are predominantly white right now, but [are] looking to become more diverse, [to] do the groundwork first. You’ve got to pull the weeds. You’ve got to break up the soil. You’ve got to cultivate the land that would make it amenable to planting the seeds that would bear fruit of diversity. . . . The minority shouldn’t be the first one at your church to broach topics of race and diversity. That should’ve already been done by the leaders, and it should’ve been done in such a way that they’re shepherding the congregation through those issues."

When Compassion is Exhausting by Melanie Dale (The Mudroom)

"But for our passions, for the things burning deep in our souls keeping us up at night moving us to tears liquefying our insides, it’s going to take more. It’s going to take partnering with really smart local people who have big plans for their own communities. It’s going to take lawyers and therapists and social workers. It’s going to take a lot. Which is why you can’t care about everything because the thing you need to care about the most needs your attention over the long haul. So find a thing and dig deep."

InterVarsity Asks Staff to Choose a Stance on Sexuality by Kate Shellnutt (Christianity Today)

One of our partner ministries, InterVarsity Christian Fellowship, made the news this past week when the response to a 20-page paper on their theological beliefs on human sexuality was made known. A number of their staff members will be leaving IV as a result. Please be in prayer for both the leaders of InterVarsity and all the staff members affected.

What it Means to be Black in the American Educational System by Kevin O’Neal Cokley (The Huffington Post)

"The results of a recent survey by the Pew Research Center underscore this point. The survey found that black Americans with some college experience are more likely to say that they have experienced discrimination compared to blacks who did not report having any college experience. Additional survey results revealed several differences between blacks with college experience versus blacks without college experience. For example, in the past 12 months, 55 percent of people with some college experience reported people had acted suspicious of them, compared to 38 percent of those with no college experience. Similarly, 52 percent of people with some college experience reported people had acted as if they thought the individual wasn’t smart, compared to 37 percent of people with no college experience."

Maps Shows History of US Immigration

The topic of immigration has been of great interest during this election season. This animated map from Business Insider illustrates immigration patterns to the U.S., including which countries were allowed to send people to the U.S. and when they were allowed to do so.

Weekly Web Roundup (9/3/16)

Photo Credit: bmward_2000

Here are some interesting stories from around the web that I've seen during this past week:

Colin Kaepernick's Protest is Part of Long Sports Tradition by Adam Howard (NBC News)

San Francisco 49ers quarterback Colin Kaepernick has received a substantial amount of flack for his recent refusal to stand while the pledge of allegiance is played before games. Personally, I appreciate Kaepernick's desire to bring attention to injustice but am concerned about what his approach communicates to our military. Be that as it may, it might surprise some that he's not the first to do this.

Hello Goodbye: The author of a best-selling abstinence manifesto is reconsidering the lessons he taught to millions by Ruth Graham (Slate)

Joshua Harris's book "I Kissed Dating Goodbye" was a best-seller among evangelicals during the late '90s and early '00s. Now, nearly twenty years after it was published, Harris has regrets about how the book has impacted some people.

Even in a Multiethnic Church, Race Can Be a Minefield (Christianity Today)

"But here’s the beauty of a multiethnic church—the beauty and the mess: I’ve got these multi-ethnic faces there, which is wonderful, but the problem is, they all have different perspectives. Literally, after that message, I had an African American man come up to me and say, “I wish you would’ve pushed a little harder.” I had a white woman come up to me all offended because I’d pushed too hard. That’s the beauty and the mess."

Sin Of Talking Too Much by Paul Tautges (via Tim Challies)

"Years ago, my men’s small group discussed the discipline of the tongue. After reading a chapter in Disciplines of a Godly Man by Kent Hughes, and verses from Proverbs that address the issue, some of us were tempted to stop talking all together! However, we quickly realized this was not the answer. That would be too easy. The right response is the hard road of self-discipline. The hard road is the application of wisdom in the restraint of the most powerful muscle in our body. That got me thinking about the dangers of talking too much."

The Mania of Michigan Football by Robin Wright (The New Yorker)

"When Michigan makes a big play, and a hundred thousand people stand up spontaneously, without being told, and ‘Hail to the Victors’ kicks in, it’s the biggest choir in America. It’s not a business, it’s a religion—and one where everyone is welcome,” John U. Bacon, the author of “Endzone: The Rise, Fall, and Return of Michigan Football,” told me. “The Dalai Lama and Mother Teresa have both noted that the great disease of Western civilization is loneliness. Yes, it’s possible to be lonely in a crowd—but not this one."

Tim Keller On Understanding Old Testament Law

Photo Credit: Brett Jordan

In this post, Pastor Tim Keller offers a good perspective on how we can best understand the Old Testament as it pertains to moral law, human sexuality and its relationship to the New Testament. In viewing the Bible  as a consistent story, the ceremonial laws of the Old Testament begin to become more clear in light of what Jesus Christ accomplished on the cross.

Understanding this helps to explain why Christians are not necessarily being inconsistent when certain laws of the Old Testament are followed and others are not.

A highlight:

"Once you grant the main premise of the Bible—about the surpassing significance of Christ and his salvation—then all the various parts of the Bible make sense. Because of Christ, the ceremonial law is repealed. Because of Christ the church is no longer a nation-state imposing civil penalties. It all falls into place. However, if you reject the idea of Christ as Son of God and Savior, then, of course, the Bible is at best a mish-mash containing some inspiration and wisdom, but most of it would have to be rejected as foolish or erroneous.

So where does this leave us? There are only two possibilities. If Christ is God, then this way of reading the Bible makes sense and is perfectly consistent with its premise. The other possibility is that you reject Christianity’s basic thesis—you don’t believe Jesus was the resurrected Son of God—and then the Bible is no sure guide for you about much of anything. But the one thing you can’t really say in fairness is that Christians are being inconsistent with their beliefs to accept the moral statements in the Old Testament while not practicing other ones.

One way to respond to the charge of inconsistency may be to ask a counter-question—“Are you asking me to deny the very heart of my Christian beliefs?” If you are asked, “Why do you say that?” you could respond, “If I believe Jesus is the the resurrected Son of God, I can’t follow all the ‘clean laws’ of diet and practice, and I can’t offer animal sacrifices. All that would be to deny the power of Christ’s death on the cross. And so those who really believe in Christ must follow some Old Testament texts and not others.”

To read the rest of Keller's post please click here.

Does Character Matter For Presidential Candidates?

Photo Credit: U.S. Embassy New Delhi

"Of all the properties which belong to honorable men, not one is so highly prized as that of character." ~ Henry Clay

In the midst of a highly contested U.S. presidential primary season, a new book uncovers aspects of the personal life of President John F. Kennedy. The book, written by a former White House aide who claims she had an affair with President Kennedy, once again raises the question of personal character as it pertains to qualifications for the nation's highest office.

The suggestion of indiscretions on behalf of President Kennedy is not news to presidential historians. This has been commonly known for some time. What is intriguing to consider is whether Kennedy would have ever gotten elected in the first place had he lived in our TMZ-driven culture. Several current individuals aspiring to the presidency have had to face allegations of their own marital infidelities and this has been fatal for some (see Herman Cain) and could be for others (see Newt Gingrich).

What this tells us that character, who we are at our moral core, still appears to matter to the American public. Robert Dallek writes in The Daily Beast why character does matter for presidents:

"Presidents are not only the country’s principal policy chief, shaping the nation’s domestic and foreign agendas, but also the most visible example of our values. As a country that prides itself on being the world’s exemplar of human rights, the rule of law, and moral standards, it is embarrassing to have men seeking and/or serving in the presidency who fall short of our highest ideals. True, most Americans give lip service to the proposition that even the most exalted among us have their flaws, but we are eager to believe that presidents manage to rise above the limitations that beset the rest of us. 

We have been constantly disappointed in the many ways presidents and lesser public officials have fallen short of what we expected of them—Harding’s Teapot Dome scandal; Harry Truman’s influence-peddling associates; John Kennedy’s hidden medical history and compulsive womanizing; Ted Kennedy’s Chappaquiddick; Lyndon Johnson’s vulgarity that many complained undermined the dignity of the presidency; Richard Nixon’s resignation for abuse of power; Ronald Reagan’s Iran-contra scandal; Bill Clinton’s Monica; and George W. Bush’s Valerie Plame expose are among the most memorable of our recent public embarrassments. 

...Whether we like it or not, president’s private lives are no longer hidden from public view. And it is not without benefit to have this information. Presidential character matters and not just for the symbolic reasons I mentioned. Wouldn’t the country have been better served taking account of Harding’s moral failings? Certainly, voters acted recklessly in ignoring complaints that Nixon, despite assertions that we were dealing with the “new” Nixon, deserved the epithet, “tricky Dick.” We were certainly forewarned about Clinton’s womanizing, which undermined his presidency. James Monroe’s assertion that “national honor is the national property of the highest value” remains an enduring ideal. 

Should politicians’ character flaws, then, bar them from office, especially the oval office? Or does this set an impossibly high standard? Probably. Presidential aspirants reach for the highest office to satisfy some yearning for greatness or even immortality. The historian Richard Hofstadter said that politics for a majority of office holders, and particularly those obsessed with getting to the White House, is a form of vocational therapy. Grandiosity or convictions about standing apart from ordinary men seems to be a central component of the country’s most ambitious politicians. Ambition, of course, is not without its virtues. But when politicians, and especially presidents, let their need to win eclipse the larger good, as has so often been the case, it makes presidential striving a national problem."

Whether a man (or woman) has been faithful to their spouse should not be the only factor in deciding who we vote for. For it is true that just because a woman or man has remained true to their marital vows does not mean they will necessarily make a good president. But I also know this: If a person hasn't been true to the one person they've vowed before God to remain faithful, it would be naive to believe that they'd be true to the common American citizen.

Yes, character still matters.

To read the complete Dallek article please click here.

What Playboy Doesn't Have Right About Sex

Photo Credit: photobunny

In a sex-saturated society such as ours, it should come as no surprise that many of us have a messed up view of our sexuality. In a culture that seems to prize sex above all else, how is it that so many problems we face revolve around this issue?

In a new article posted on Kyria.com, Les Parrot tackles this complicated topic in a piece entitled "Sex as Sacred." Examining the influence that Playboy and its founder, Hugh Hefner, have had on our society, Parrot unpacks God's intentions for our sexuality.

He says this:

"Hugh Hefner thinks of himself as a prophet, even a missionary, who has led America out of sexual repression into a new era of sexual freedom. He never admits that it is all based on a lie—probably because he was too intoxicated on his own hedonistic hysteria to even notice. He never figured out that the sexually liberated society he envisioned, and that we now live in, is built on a warped and distorted attitude toward sex. 

By the standards of today's "liberated" man, the purpose of sex is personal pleasure—and women, along with pornography or whatever else strikes his fancy—are to be used as a means to achieving it. In Hef's world women are merely sexual playthings for male fantasies. Hefner, in his drive to free us from sexual self-restraint and modesty, has neglected to figure out the true purpose and pleasure of sex. 

Of course, that's understandable. He's not looking for it. He's not attempting to live his life by God's standards. Quite the contrary. He even scoffs at the idea of sexual morality. He doesn't care to be honorable and monogamous in his sex life. But you and I do. And that's why, for us, the purpose of sex is paramount. 

...When we sever the connection of sex from the sacred, we neglect our spiritual longings. The French sociologist Jacques Ellul saw our modern fixation with sex as the symptom of a breakdown in intimacy. Having detached the physical act of sex from relationship, we become spiritually bankrupt. And I've worked with enough men in my counseling office to see firsthand the desperate looks of loneliness and despair when men have compulsively reduced sex to simple self-gratification. It's inevitable when we neglect the sacred aspect of the gift of sex."

God is not against sex. In fact, he invented it. But when we seek to find sexual fulfillment outside of his intended plans, we miss out on all that God had in mind when He created humans as unique sexual beings. We find ourselves searching outside of God's design to fulfill our need for physical pleasure, even though this quest often leaves us feeling heartbroken and empty.

As the great British writer, C.S. Lewis, said in "The Weight of Glory":

"Indeed, if we consider the unblushing promises of reward and the staggering nature of the rewards promised in the Gospels, it would seem that our Lord finds our desires, not too strong, but too weak. We are half-hearted creatures, fooling about with drink and sex and ambition when infinite joy is offered us, like an ignorant child who wants to go on making mud pies in a slum because he cannot imagine what is meant by the offer of a holiday at the sea. We are far too easily pleased."

Why Single Women Need To Wait For The Right Man

Photo Credit: de.laina

Here are some challenging thoughts from Ruthie Dean urging single women to wait on the right mate by being the right mate:

"As women, I believe we in part perpetuate the man-boy problem by failing to hold the highest standards for ourselves, standards God desires for us. I recently heard a friend complaining that she couldn’t get Phillip* to call her. Two minutes later, she responded to his text, “Wanna watch a movie at my house?” in the affirmative. I’ve seen it too many times—brilliant, accomplished, God-fearing women making excuses for the players and the deadbeats and the guy who aren’t interested in anything more than sex. A lot of us have been there. We’re strong. We aren’t settling. And then we lose sight of what’s important and start “hanging out with” that guy. If a man can’t call to ask you on a date, he’s certainly not going to man-up and put a ring on your finger. 

The arguably most dangerous way women are contributing to the man-boy problem is in regards to sex. Oftentimes, women, including Christians, go further physically than they want to, hoping that their prowess will help them ‘catch a man’ when in fact, the opposite happens. Sex gives men the benefits without the promise of commitment and fidelity. Sure, there won’t be as many guys lining up to date you, but marriage will be a different story. Keeping the highest sexual purity standards will ensure he isn’t dating you just because he likes seeing you naked—and keep his intentions honorable. 

Another way women perpetuate the problem comes with the well-at-least-he’s-better-than _____ game. My hairdresser told me yesterday she had a hard time ending a relationship with a non-Christian, because the last Christian she dated had sent her pornographic text messages. Infuriating! However, standards should not be created based on the worst examples but instead on what God deems right. 

Many women also fall prey to the lie that dating or hanging out with “that guy” does not hold future implications. I found this especially true in college when friends (and myself, ahem) would date Mr. Text or Mr. I Don’t Believe in Organized Religion believing we could end the relationships as soon as someone better came along. However many of my friends are still entangled with or damaged by these men—especially in cases where sex was involved. By dating or playing around with the wrong men, we are essentially displaying mistrust in God’s plan and harming ourselves when the right man comes along. Andy Stanley, pastor of North Point Community Church, challenges singles: “Become the right person the right person is looking for.” A woman who dates placeholder men is most likely not who “Mr. Right” is looking for."

To read the rest of the article "Real Women Don't Text Back" please click here.

The Church's Dirty Little Secret: Christians & Porn

Photo Credit: Ayelie

From CNN.com:

"He is a good Christian, Michael is telling his two therapists. He goes to church most Sundays. He’s a devoted husband and father of two daughters.

“But when I would leave on business trips,” he says, “I knew I was going to get to be someone else. Prostitutes, porn - I took anything I wanted.”

Sitting on a comfortable, worn couch, Michael glances out the window and sees a reflection of himself set against the parking lot of this suburban Atlanta office building. He fidgets, runs his fingers over his closely cropped blond hair and straightens his green tennis polo. He clears his throat.

Above his head hangs a poster covered in words describing feelings - angry, anxious, sad. On it is a big yellow cross. Therapists Richard Blankenship and Mark Richardson wear solemn but empathetic expressions. Certified counselors and Christian ministers, they tell him they know how to listen and nod for him to continue.

“I’ve had a record of purity since March when I confessed to my wife,” says Michael, whose name has been changed by CNN.com to protect his privacy. “No porn, no masturbation.”

“Awesome,” Richardson says, leaning forward in his chair. “God knows you’re trying.”

This is Michael’s second week at “Faithful and True – Atlanta” a 16-week counseling program that, like dozens of others like it around the country, combines traditional psychotherapy with the Bible in an attempt to treat addictive behavior.

Blankenship, a devout Christian who once struggled with sexual abuse, says his own ordeal has helped him to treat and “graduate” nearly 500 Christian men and women with similar addictions in the last five years. He says he has helped people achieve what he calls “sobriety,” which means resisting porn and lustful thoughts.

Though controversial in secular circles, much of the evangelical Christian world has been cheering this relatively new kind of therapy. Many believers, including many Christian leaders, consider it a powerful tool for fighting what they say is one of the modern church’s biggest problems: porn addiction."

To read the complete article please click here.

How The Selling Of Sex Is Destroying Our World

Photo Credit: @sahxic < twitter

We live in a sex-saturated society and the selling of sex is destroying our world. Look at what Newsweek has to say:

"Men of all ages, races, religions, and backgrounds do it. Rich men do it, and poor men do it, in forms so varied and ubiquitous that they can be summoned at a moment’s notice.

And yet surprisingly little is known about the age-old practice of buying sex, long assumed to be inevitable. No one even knows what proportion of the male population does it; estimates range from 16 percent to 80 percent. “Ninety-nine percent of the research in this field has been done on prostitutes, and 1 percent has been done on johns,” says Melissa Farley, director of Prostitution Research and Education, a nonprofit organization that is a project of San Francisco Women’s Centers.

A clinical psychologist, Farley studies prostitution, trafficking, and sexual violence, but even she wasn’t sure how representative her results were. “The question has always remained: are all our findings true of just sex buyers, or are they true of men in general?” she says.

In a new study released exclusively to NEWSWEEK, “Comparing Sex Buyers With Men Who Don’t Buy Sex,” Farley provides some startling answers. Although the two groups share many attitudes about women and sex, they differ in significant ways illustrated by two quotes that serve as the report’s subtitle.

One man in the study explained why he likes to buy prostitutes: “You can have a good time with the servitude,” he said. A contrasting view was expressed by another man as the reason he doesn’t buy sex: “You’re supporting a system of degradation,” he said.

And yet buying sex is so pervasive that Farley’s team had a shockingly difficult time locating men who really don’t do it. The use of pornography, phone sex, lap dances, and other services has become so widespread that the researchers were forced to loosen their definition in order to assemble a 100-person control group.

“We had big, big trouble finding nonusers,” Farley says. “We finally had to settle on a definition of non-sex-buyers as men who have not been to a strip club more than two times in the past year, have not purchased a lap dance, have not used pornography more than one time in the last month, and have not purchased phone sex or the services of a sex worker, escort, erotic masseuse, or prostitute.”

Many experts believe the digital age has spawned an enormous increase in sexual exploitation; today anyone with access to the Internet can easily make a “date” through online postings, escort agencies, and other suppliers who cater to virtually any sexual predilection. The burgeoning demand has led to a dizzying proliferation of services so commonplace that many men don’t see erotic massages, strip clubs, or lap dances as forms of prostitution. “The more the commercial sex industry normalizes this behavior, the more of this behavior you get,” says Norma Ramos, executive director of the Coalition Against Trafficking in Women (CATW)."

For many that engage in the solicitation of the services of prostitutes and for those that participate in the use of pornography, it may feel like their behavior is innocent fun. However, research shows that nothing could be further from the truth. Look at the following facts from International Justice Mission (IJM):

- The total market value of illicit human trafficking is estimated to be in excess of $32 billion (U.N.)

- Each year, more than 2 million children are exploited in the global commercial sex trade (UNICEF)

- 27 million men, women and children are held as slaves. (Kevin Bales, Disposable People)

- 1 in 5 women is a victim of rape or attempted rape in her lifetime. (U.N. Development Fund for Women)

The commercialization of sex is not only destructive to our culture but it ruins millions of lives every year.  Don't be fooled. If you are personally involved in sexually addictive behavior please click here for help. 

Or perhaps you can help those affected by the sex trade by getting involved in the work of IJM by going here.

To read the complete Newsweek article, "The John Next Door", click here.

The Heart Behind Why Powerful Men Sin

Photo Credit: Tony the Misfit

With a number of political figures recently in the news for their sexual misbehavior, there has been an increased dialogue around the reasons behind why those with so much to lose have a difficult time controlling their sexual urges.

Both Time Magazine and The New York Times weigh in on this issue:

From Time:

"By now social commentators have the explanations on auto-save: We know that powerful men can be powerfully reckless, particularly when, like [Dominique Strauss-Kahn], they stand at the brink of their grandest achievement. They tend to be risk takers or at least assess risk differently — as do narcissists who come to believe that ordinary rules don't apply. They are often surrounded by enablers with a personal or political interest in protecting them to the point of covering up their follies, indiscretions and crimes. A study set to be published in Psychological Science found that the higher men — or women — rose in a business hierarchy, the more likely they were to consider or commit adultery. With power comes both opportunity and confidence, the authors argue, and with confidence comes a sense of sexual entitlement. If fame and power make sex more constantly available, the evolutionary biologists explain, it may weaken the mechanisms of self-restraint and erode the layers of socialization that we impose on teenage boys and hope they eventually internalize.

"When men have more opportunity, they tend to act on that opportunity," says psychologist Mark Held, a private practitioner in the Denver area who specializes in male sexuality and the problems of overachievers. "The challenge becomes developing ways to control the impulses so you don't get yourself into self-defeating situations."

Nature matters, but so does nurture. Members of royal families are born into a world of indulgence and entitlement, and the princelings who grow up that way may never have to develop any discipline. Athletes often start life at the opposite end of the wealth-and-prestige spectrum, but as soon as they exhibit an unusual talent for swinging a bat or sinking a free throw, often early in adolescence, they may become a kind of local royalty and find that the rules have been suspended for them. They are waved through school and into the pros, and bad behavior is overlooked or covered up. Any skills they may have been developing for self-control or self-denial quickly deteriorate."

From The New York Times on the difference between men and women who are politicians:

"Research points to a substantial gender gap in the way women and men approach running for office. Women have different reasons for running, are more reluctant to do so and, because there are so few of them in politics, are acutely aware of the scrutiny they draw — all of which seems to lead to differences in the way they handle their jobs once elected.

"The shorthand of it is that women run for office to do something, and men run for office to be somebody," said Debbie Walsh, director of the Center for American Women and Politics at Rutgers University. "Women run because there is some public issue that they care about, some change they want to make, some issue that is a priority for them, and men tend to run for office because they see this as a career path."

Studies show that women are less likely to run for office; it is more difficult to recruit them, even when they have the same professional and educational qualifications as men. Men who run for office tend to look at people already elected "and say, 'I’m as good as that,'"said Jennifer Lawless, director of the Women and Politics Institute at American University here. "Women hold themselves up to this hypothetical standard no candidate has ever achieved."

So why do men in politics sin? The same reason we all do. They have a sin nature just like I do and just like you do.  When you throw in power, money and opportunity, it's not that difficult to figure out why elected officials will betray the trust of their spouses, their families, their constituents and their God for sexual gratification.  Without a heart redeemed by God's grace, we are all in danger of falling prey to the same traps as those in the public eye.

The temptations that we face today are no different than those faced by others for centuries.  The lust of the flesh, the lust of the eyes and the pride of life are still what ensnares us (see I John 2:15-17) and without consistent examination of our own hearts, we, too, will get tripped up.  The gospel of Jesus provides the spiritual heart transplant that we all need.

It is not enough to just focus on the sins we commit but we need to honestly examine the motivation behind why we do the things we do.  When we run to idols (those things that take God's rightful place in our life) for life, comfort and satisfaction, we will never discover fulfillment and will always find heartbreak.  Jesus is not simply interested in changing our behavior so that we can abide by an accepted moral code of ethics.  He wants to change our hearts in order to make us into new people with new desires and a new purpose in life.  Changed behavior may lead to temporal acceptance but a new heart will lead to a changed destiny.

Alice Cooper on Faith, Sex and Marriage

Photo Credit:
Dena Flows

Alice Cooper is probably best known for his brand of "shock rock", theatrical concerts and hits "School's Out" and "No More Mr. Nice Guy."  But few know that Cooper publicly identifies himself as a Christian and claims to be a committed follower of Jesus Christ.  Having grown up in a family of faith, Cooper left behind his Christian upbringing during his teens and venture into rock and roll.  In a past interview with JesusJournal.com, he comments on the rediscovery of his faith later in life and his views on God and the Devil:

"I was pretty much convinced all my life that there was just one God and there was Jesus Christ and there was the Devil," he told KNAC.com. "You couldn't believe in God without believing in the Devil. I always tell bands that the most dangerous thing you can do is to believe in the concept of the Devil or the concept of God, because you're not giving them full credit. When you believe in God, you've got to believe in the all-powerful God. He's not just God, He's the all-powerful God and He has total control over everyone's life. The Devil, on the other hand, is a real character that's trying his hardest to tear your life apart. If you believe that this is just mythology, you're a prime target because you know that's exactly what Satan wants: To be a myth. But he's not a myth, of this I'm totally convinced. More than anything in the world, I'm convinced of that."

As a popular entertainer in a profession known for its decadence and rebellion, Cooper possesses a remarkably refreshing perspective on relationships. Check out this video as Cooper shares his thoughts on sex and marriage. Please click here if the video player does not show up. (h/t to Tim Challies for the video link)

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Qur'an Burnings, Porn Stars & WWJD

Photo Credit: Tobey_Cat

Several years ago a popular trend swept through modern Christian circles as a number of people began sporting simple cloth bracelets with four initials imprinted upon them -- WWJD ("What Would Jesus Do?"). The bracelets were inspired by Charles Sheldon's 1896 book, In His Steps, in which members of a fictional town committed to not do anything for a year without first asking themselves what Jesus would do in the same situation.  Although the bracelets have waned in popularity, I think present events dictate that the question still needs to be asked.  What would Jesus do?

A little-known pastor with a fairly small congregation in Gainesville, Florida has ignited a media firestorm over his plans to hold a public burning of the Qur'an, the holy book of the Muslim faith.  Although Rev. Terry Jones has said that he believes he is following God's will, a number of Christians and public officials have condemned his plans.  Just as many Christians have expected Muslim clerics to publicly condemn acts of terrorism and hatred, we Christians should let it be known that we oppose the actions of those that act in the name of our God, yet do so contrary to our faith.

To burn a book that Muslims revere will only inflame the tensions between Christians and Muslims around the world and make genuine dialogue more difficult.  It is true that Muslims and Christians have many disagreements.  We do not view Christ in the same way, we have different views on the Bible and the Qur'an and we do not see salvation in the same manner.  But book burning never changed a heart and insults only make things more difficult.  California pastor Rick Warren said this about the matter on his Twitter account, ""Book burning is a cowardly act by those afraid their beliefs aren't strong enough to attract if people are allowed a choice."

If Pastor Jones were genuinely sincere in his desire to see Muslims come to the Christian faith, there are better ways for him to see that happen.  He could look to the example of Craig Gross, the founder of XXXchurch.com, a Christian ministry founded to help deliver people from the bondage of pornography and sexual sin.  Gross recently wrote a provocative piece for CNN.com entitled "Jesus loves porn stars", in which he shares how he has built a genuine friendship with Ron Jeremy, a well-known figure in the adult entertainment industry.

Since he's opposed to the porn industry, Gross could destroy porn DVD's, try to shut down websites and protest at industry conventions.  But he's taken a much different approach.  Gross has gotten to know Jeremy through a nationwide tour that they have done together on college campuses as they have debated the place of pornography in our culture.  Naturally, Gross has received a lot of flack from a number of folks in Christian circles that feel uncomfortable talking about sex and some look down upon him because he's actually friends with a porn star.  But Gross is in good company.  Jesus himself was derided as a "friend of sinners" and although others called him that in contempt, it is an accurate description.

Jesus hung with those that were considered the scourge of his society (the prostitutes and tax collectors) but he loved them just the same.  Craig Gross has a challenging perspective on his relationship with Ron Jeremy:

"We are opponents on stage but off stage we are great friends. That's really what this is about. Jesus dined with tax collectors and befriended prostitutes. I don't want to be known as the guy who debates Ron, I'd rather be known as the guy who loves Ron."

Gross pulls no punches in his views on pornography. He feels it is evil and destroys lives. He hates porn. But he loves porn stars.  I wonder if Terry Jones took a different approach to Islam if things might turn out differently.  He wouldn't generate worldwide media coverage but inviting a local imam to dinner might be more effective than the approach he's currently planning on taking.  But I get the feeling that he's probably not interested in that.  He seems more concerned with expressing his disdain for Islam rather than God's love for Muslims.

So what would Jesus do?  It's certainly a good question to ask ourselves...

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UPDATE: Apparently Pastor Terry Jones has had a change of heart and has canceled his planned Qur'an burning.  While this is certainly an answer to prayer, his condition of doing so is based on a change plans of the proposed "Ground Zero" mosque in New York.  Stay tuned for more details.

John Mayer on Porn and Relationships

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College Students & the Hook Up

The following is taken from the Ivy Jungle Network Campus Ministry Update, December 2009:

Hook-Up Gender Gap: "That men and women pursue sex for different reasons is not a new discovery – women are looking for love and men are looking for, well, sex. In the current hook up culture, however, the benefit is clearly for the guys – sex without relationship. Some sociologists suggest that the current love affair with the Twilight series among young women may in fact be a reaction to the hook up culture; a fantasy of love without sex. Kaltheene Bogle, author of Hooking Up: Sex, Dating, and Relationships on Campus states that most students perceive the hook up culture on campus to be even worse than it is. Nationally, about 25% of college students remain virgins. Among the 78% of students who reported hook ups at one university in the study, only 38% included intercourse. For many college women today, they feel that without a level of easy sexual activity, they may never find a boyfriend. Guys are ok with that, often enjoying the hook up and not calling back. Given the 5:4 ratio of women to men on campus, the competition favors the guys as well."
(Chicago Tribune November 29, 2009)

Roman Polanski, Hollywood & Morality

The curious case of film director Roman Polanski has been drawing quite a bit of attention recently as a result of his arrest in Switzerland on charges stemming from something that happened over thirty years ago. In case you're not aware, Polanski, who is an Oscar winner and a highly regarded filmmaker in Hollywood circles, was arrested in 1977 for having sex with a thirteen year old girl after providing drugs and alcohol for her.

After entering into a plea agreement at the time, Polanski spent six weeks in jail for evaluation and was released. Upon learning that he might be sent to jail, he left the United States and has never returned. Polanski has avoided any country that has an extradition treaty with the U.S. and, therefore, has never been fully prosecuted for his crime.

His case has stirred up a lot of controversy as many in the Hollywood establishment have come to his defense and called for his release. But the general public doesn't view Polanski primarily as an Oscar winner. What most of us see is someone that raped a barely teenage girl and has escaped judgment. Paul Harris frames it well:

"The Polanski backlash has spread far and wide. He was never popular at all on the right wing of America's culture, but now middle America is firmly in favour of seeing him in a Californian courtroom. Talk show hosts, radio commentators and newspaper editorials from coast to coast have all insisted that the arrest was long overdue and that Polanski needs to be brought to the US.

"Hollywood people really don't see the world in the same way as average people... that is why there is a backlash," said Mike Levine, a Hollywood PR expert.

But it is perhaps no surprise that the gap between Hollywood and the rest of America has grown so large on this particular case. Because of his long and illustrious career, Polanski is a friend and colleague of nearly all the main players in the film world. They are his confidantes and his peers. His movies have made them stars and helped them to earn millions. They live in the same rarefied world of global fame. "Elite Hollywood culture is protecting one of its own," said Alexander Riley, a professor of sociology at Bucknell University.

It is also speaks to a certain type of Hollywood culture which appears to insist that its top stars are in some ways elevated above the law and should be treated differently to ordinary members of the public.

If Polanski was just an ordinary man instead of a world-famous film director, the bare facts of his case would be likely to elicit little sympathy – especially from the world famous. Hollywood stars seem to be arguing, in some ways, that Polanski's talent should allow him some sort of free pass for his past behaviour. "Hollywood... looks at the Polanski case and says, 'You have to make allowances for genius'," said Gallagher.

Hollywood's elite also functions as a kind of club and Polanski, seen by the elite as a great European auteur director, is a firm member. That requires a certain degree of success but also a great deal of ideological conformity. It is a cliche that Hollywood is uniformly liberal in its politics, but one with more than a dash of truth in it. It is certainly interesting to see the reaction to Polanski's case and compare it with the reaction to Mel Gibson, when he was caught mouthing drunken anti-Semitic abuse.

Gibson, a rare conservative in Hollywood, was brutally condemned by his fellow stars and sent into virtual career exile. Polanski, whose crime is far more serious, has seen a vast outpouring of sympathy. Being a member of the Hollywood club certainly seems to have its privileges.

"The difference between the reaction to Gibson and the reaction to Polanski has been just huge. Huge!" said celebrity interviewer Gayl Murphy. "That says a lot about what Hollywood thinks is important to them."

In some respects, Polanski is a sympathetic figure. A diminutive man who survived the Holocaust and had his second wife, actress Sharon Tate, killed by the Charles Manson gang in 1969, he has certainly gone through his fair share of suffering in life. But his suffering does not give him a free pass to perform criminal acts on young girls. Perhaps those in Hollywood will eventually see this.

Adultery is Big Business on the Internet

I guess it was only a matter of time before this happened but the website AshleyMadison.com has learned that there is big business in adultery. In seven short years, the website, whose tag line is "Life is Short. Have an Affair", has made over 20 million dollars in its promotion of adultery.

Its founder, Noel Biderman, really doesn't see a problem with what he's doing and thinks he's only providing a service for something that's in demand. But, of course, he doesn't quite feel the same if things struck close to home for him. Look what he says in a TIME magazine article:

"Humans aren't meant to be monogamous," [Biderman] says. So would this free-thinking CEO mind if his own wife used his site? "I would be devastated," he says."

It is no big news that there is a lot of money to be made in sin. And with sites like the aforementioned now available on mobile devices, it makes cheating all the easier. The homepage on the website boasts that you can "Join free & change your life today. Guaranteed!" I'm sure that those that will use this site have their lives changed but I doubt it is for the better. It may be free but it sure is costly.

The CEO of the company enjoys getting rich off of other peoples' broken marriages but admits he wouldn't want his wife to become a member of his own website. With as much good that is offered on the Internet it's sad that there is so much more garbage that leads to destroyed lives. A fulfilled life will not be found through sites that promote cheating and marital unfaithfulness. So if you're struggling in your marriage, I encourage you to visit this site instead.

(Thanks to Breaking Free for bringing this to my attention.)

The Subtle Pull of Pornography

In a troubled and struggling American economy, there is one industry that seems to be in no danger of loss of revenue. And that would be the business of pornography. According to Family Safe Media, the porn industry generated over 13 billion in profits for 2006. If that doesn't shock you, that is more than the COMBINED revenue of Microsoft, Google, Amazon, eBay, Yahoo!, Apple, Netflix and EarthLink for that year!

Some other startling statistics:

- There are 4.2 million pornographic websites, which is 12% of total websites.

- Almost 43% of Internet users view porn on a regular basis.

- 20% of men admit to accessing pornography at work.

- 90% of 8-16 year olds having viewed porn online, most while doing their homework.

- Every second, $3,075.64 is being spent on and 28,258 Internet users are viewing porn.

- Every 39 minutes a new pornographic video is being created in the United States.

If these statistics are unsettling for you, they should be. So how did such a generally frowned upon practice become so commonplace within American culture? The website, Breaking Free, recently wrote about the history of porn within human civilization. From drawings on cave walls to the invention of the Gutenberg Press to the photographic camera to movies, Playboy and VCR's to the present Internet age, makers of pornography have remained on the cutting edge of technology in order to offer their product to an all-too-willing public.

Sadly, Christians often find themselves caught in the web of pornography as well. According to that same Family Safe Media study mentioned earlier, 53% of men involved with Promise Keepers viewed porn within the last week. And porn is not just affecting men. In a poll conducted by ChristaNet.com, 20% of Christian women are addicted to pornography.

Because of the widespread use of the Internet and the ease of accessing pornography, even unintentionally, a growing number of people are developing addictive patterns to porn that are affecting their personal lives, families and work. Were it not for addressing my own struggles in this area shortly after entering adulthood, I shudder to think of where it could have led.

I know too many Christian men that are truly seeking to live a godly life affected by this issue to think that any of us are immune from this struggle. Even those of us that serve in vocational Christian ministry are affected. In fact, a couple of courageous Christian artists, Clay Crosse and Kirk Franklin, have been vocal about their own struggles with porn and the healing that God has brought in their life with this issue.

So why does porn get so many into its grip? Walter Kendrick, author of The Secret Museum: Pornography in Modern Culture, has this to say:

"Pornography is always unsatisfied. It’s always a substitute for the contact between two bodies, so there’s a drive behind it that doesn’t exist in other genres. Pornographers have been the most inventive and resourceful users of whatever medium comes along because they and their audience have always wanted innovations. Pornographers are excluded from the mainstream channels, so they look around for something new, and the audience has a desire to try any innovation that gives them greater realism or immediacy."

A casual look at a magazine can lead to perusal on the Internet which can lead to videos and then onto strip clubs and even prostitutes. It is a never ending cycle once the claws of porn have gripped your mind and heart. Like any other addiction, those in bondage to pornography need help from others to find deliverance and healing. If you're someone that is currently struggling with an addiction to porn, I encourage you to read this article by Gene McConnell or visit Pure Online. Then talk to someone you trust that can aid you getting the help you need. If there is not someone in your life that you feel like you can talk to, feel free to shoot me a message.

Sex and Our Society

Due to the kindness of some friends of our ministry, my family and I (along with a number of our Impact staff) was able to spend the day yesterday at Busch Gardens in Tampa. We had a great time together as a family riding the rides and seeing the animals at the park.

But something concerned me during our time there. Maybe I'm just getting older or I'm looking at life more through my eyes as a father, but I was troubled by the fashion and how some of the youth at the park were carrying themselves.

While waiting in line with my four-year-old son to ride the bumper cars, there were a couple of kids a ways up ahead of us. The girl couldn't have been more than 15; the boy looked to be 16 or 17. The girl's clothing not only left little to the imagination, but they were all over each other as they wandered through the line. A number of thoughts ran through my mind... Did her parents approve of what she was wearing before she left the house? Was her father an active part of her life and how would he feel if he saw this young man groping his daughter in public? I said a silent prayer for these two kids and asked that God would reveal himself to them.

The standards for personal morality in our society have certainly lowered in recent decades. Things that once were taboo are accepted and that which used to be considered deviant is considered normal. Albert Mohler, president of Southern Baptist Theological Seminary, was recently interviewed by New Man magazine on sexual tolerance in our society. Dr. Mohler writes a popular blog that I regularly read. Although I don't always agree with his conclusions, I find his thinking challenging and thought-provoking.

In his New Man interview, Dr. Mohler discusses how our changing views on sexuality have affected society in general and our families, specifically. Some highlights:

"Unlike the postmodern relativists, Christians cannot accept the claim that all sexual standards are mere social constructs. Unlike the marketing geniuses and advertising gurus, we do not believe that sexuality is intended as a ploy to get attention and to create consumer demand. Unlike the sexual revolutionaries of recent decades, we do not believe that sexuality is the means of liberating the self from cultural oppression. In other words, we believe that sex is less important than many would have us believe. Human existence is not, first and foremost, about sexual pleasure and the display of sexuality. There is much more to human life, fulfillment, and joy. Sex simply cannot deliver the promises made by our hypersexualized society. On the other hand, sex is far more important than secular society can envision. After all, the Christian worldview reveals that sex, gender and sexuality are ultimately about the creature’s purpose to glorify the Creator.
Heterosexual marriage has been assaulted by divorce, lifestyle, media, law, politics and customs, undermining its very essence. Of course, the attack also necessarily took its toll on the family as well. Pitirim A. Sorokin, founder of the department of sociology at Harvard University, argued that heterosexual marriage is the foundation of civilization itself. Unless heterosexual marriage is protected by law, custom and habit to the exclusion of every other arrangement, civilization is impossible. Sorokin made this point more than 50 years ago. Even from such a distance, he saw this age of perversity arising, and he argued that this age of rebellion would destroy civilization. The great question of our day is this: Will this civilization wake up once marriage is clearly understood to be the critical background and the primary target of attack? Can civilization survive under these circumstances? I would have to argue that it cannot. There is no example in the history of humankind of a civilization enduring for long when an age of polymorphous perversity is set loose."

Although many may view the Christian view of sexuality as prudish and old-fashioned, it would be hard to argue that the removal of traditional restraints when it comes to sex has generally benefited either individuals or society. The biblical standard of faithfulness in marriage is frequently mocked yet lives continue to be broken when this standard is ignored. I hope that we will one day realize that our freedom to do what is right in our own eyes will leave our children to inherit a world where sexual pleasure becomes god and righteousness is treated as yesterday's news. Perhaps that is already our reality, but I hope that the world my children become adults in is different than the one I did.

Not Heard From the Pulpit

The following article recently appeared in the religion column of USA Today and is certainly a challenge to what we emphasize and what we neglect. I don't totally agree with all of this, but it certainly does get me thinking...

"Preachers and Sunday school teachers are pulling their punches these days regarding morality. Our nation needs ethical and religious instruction in the basics: honesty, fidelity, humility, sharing wealth, sharing power and sacrifice. Yet those are the last topics one is likely to hear in churches. Instead, for more than a decade, preachers have been grandstanding about such secondary issues as sexuality, Christmas greetings and institution-building.

Consider the day in 2004 when former Enron Corp. chief Ken Lay appeared in federal court to answer an 11-count indictment for fraud, conspiracy and false statements. (Lay is on trial in Houston.) On the way to court, he stopped by Houston's prominent First United Methodist Church to pray. His pastor accompanied him when he turned himself in to authorities. Good gestures, to be sure, but how had Lay, a regular worshiper and lay leader, gotten so ethically challenged? Some ethical guidance clearly had gone unheard or unspoken. His church encourages "disciplines of faithful living," but current Sunday classes sound the bell for self-improvement, not sacrificial giving or courageous honesty in a world growing accustomed to deceit.

When WorldCom chief Bernard Ebbers began to feel the heat of scandal, he stood before his friends at Easthaven Baptist Church, in Brookhaven, Miss., and declared, "I just want you to know you aren't going to church with a crook." A federal jury disagreed and convicted him of fraud. How could a dedicated Sunday school teacher have gotten so off track? His church's mission statement is about the institution's growth potential, not about living decent lives.

Attending church surely doesn't make one immune to ungodly deeds? we are all sinners, after all? But churchgoers should be able to get guidance on how to lead a responsible life, not reminders of church politics, from the pulpit. Jesus devoted roughly two-thirds of his teachings to our need to give away wealth and to value humility and servanthood more than power. Paul condemned "love of money." Hebrew prophets spoke forcefully against greed, bribery and injustice. The Law of Moses is concerned with basic ethics? Respect for persons and property, truth-telling, generosity and mercy.

Yet, in the typical congregation, it is safer to preach about someone else's sexual behavior than about wise and faithful use of money, or on economic dislocation, corporate ethics or widening gaps in the distribution of wealth. That's my conclusion based on a survey of several dozen websites and posted sermons, as well as my experience both as a preacher and listener.

One winning formula goes after themes that are minor in Scripture but big in the culture wars. Consider Tom DeLay, often identified as a born-again Christian, whose indictment for money laundering forced him to resign as Republican leader in the House of Representatives. A recent sermon series at a church with which he used to be associated condemned homosexuality, abortion and gambling. But it ignored Scripture's more basic theme of honesty and mercy as hallmarks of truth, and leadership as requiring people "who fear God, are trustworthy, and hate dishonest gain."

With rare exceptions, preachers of all stripes seem to avoid what Jesus said about wealth and power. Instead, they preach about church politics, upcoming festivals and personal improvement. Despite cascading corporate and political scandals, a widening gap between rich and poor and mounting arrogance in public life, I read hardly a word about honesty, integrity, mercy, forgiveness, generosity, kindness or humility.

I know how dangerous it is to venture into the nuts and bolts of Christian ethics. People will endure sermons about esoterica such as stem cell research or same-sex marriage, but they'll squirm when talk turns to personal priorities, time spent away from family, wealth accumulation, casual adultery or truth-telling. It is safer to lambaste gays than to tout Jesus' model of embracing diversity. It is more profitable to back one political party than to call all leaders to account for their behavior. A dull preacher will be tolerated; an intrusive one will be fired.

Our nation needs better from us. We don't need extremist politics masquerading as Christian morality. We need solid and consistent instruction in the basics of godly living. We can't hold churches accountable for what parishioners refuse to hear. But we can hold them accountable for what they shrink from saying.

Tom Ehrich is an Episcopal pastor, author, teacher and
writer in Durham, N.C.

I remember years ago visiting a fairly conservative church (I won't mention the denomination or city less it contribute to unfair stereotyping). But within this straight-laced congregation, there was only one thing that the pastor said during his 45-minute sermon that got the parishioners off their feet with thunderous applause. Was it when he talked about Jesus being born? No. Was it when he talked about Jesus conquering sin and death by rising from the dead? Not really. Surely it was when he reminded us that though we were depraved sinners, Christ shed His blood so that our sins could be forgiven. Nope. It was when he boldly and defiantly and almost with anger shouted, "Homosexuality is a sin and that's all there is to it." This statement brought the house down.

Why is it that talk of other people's sin gets a rise out of us, but when someone addresses our own wickedness we want them to just shut up? Don't get me wrong here, part of the church's role is to speak out against wickedness in society and work for justice for those wronged. But why do we speak out so much more about issues outside our congregation, then the sin that is within? Members of our congregations (including yours truly) have more than our fair share of pride, selfishness, greed, lust, prejudice, gluttony and a bevy of other sins. I think Jesus' words from the Sermon on the Mount suffice:

"Do not judge, or you too will be judged. For in the same way you judge others, you will be judged, and with the measure you use, it will be measured to you. Why do you look at the speck of sawdust in your brother's eye and pay no attention to the plank in your own eye? How can you say to your brother, 'Let me take the speck out of your eye,' when all the time there is a plank in your own eye? You hypocrite, first take the plank out of your own eye, and then you will see clearly to remove the speck from your brother's eye."

Jesus just always has a way of putting it, doesn't He?